Hey guys,

I moved out out of my place for the better. I was happy but I felt depress at the same time, I know it doesn't make sense at all but thats the only way I can explain it. I'm really happy to be in a different enviroment that seems to me more calm and up beat. I feel like I can be really my self without trying to "be" someone I'm not. I love my mom and sister so much but the constant agruing and pissy moods we all go through was alittle to much on my part(they had there pissy moods 24/7 I felt). I kinda felt bad that I might broke up my family but I still want to be in there lives so it not really breaking up the faily right? Tomorrow I will be starting the traing for CNA...I'm alittle nervous but I'm slowly trying to thinki its something I need to do! I moved in my lovers place so I'll pot pictures of me and my lover. I love her so much and she supporting me now and even in the past. So that comes to the journal, I used to be lost and didn't know who I was and why I did the weird things I thought people hate. I didn't know why I love drawing or why it made me happy. I found out last night, because my artwork is like me growing and changing for the better or for the worst. Its my confort zone that I can alway run back to and had a security of knowing it made me happy. Later when I got lost I stop drawing and focused on me and I think thats the worst thing I ever did because I think it was a healthy out let for my pain and anger I had inside me. After being so numb someone just walked into my little world and grab my hand pulled me up and pushed me alittle ahead and kept telling me not to turned back and only told me that I'm strong and that I'll get out of this depression. I'm starting to see that without this person along with a few others that I wouldn't be here with a smiling face and drawing again. I love my support in my life so much. So I'm drawing more now with me being happy, and I found out that I love charcole and pastels drawings now. I'm happy that artwork is improving with the chibis because I lurves me some chibis! But got to go and upated other sites bye bye